Ten Years

Dear Me,

You were twenty years old when you got married. 

You said yes to someone that you dated for only three months. 

Someone you barely knew. 

Did you even know yourself back then?

Six months later you were married. 

Ambitions.

Dreams. 

There were soo many things to see. 

The world was at our fingertips. 

Everyday felt brand new. 

Five years went by in a flash.

We were ready to have a baby.

It took us over a year to conceive. 

Avelynn Mae was born. 

Sadly she left this earth when she was only two years old. 

I lost my heart. 

My soul. 

I couldn’t feel. 

My head was foggy. 

My heart felt disconnected from my body. 

Afraid.

All alone.

I quickly realized I wasn’t living the life that was meant for me. 

I was dying.

Not living.

Death was coming for me. 

I removed myself from a life that I no longer recognized. 

Ten years. 

I’m glad one of us could do it said he. 

I was stuck in a very bad dream. 

I will not be fake happy. 

I can’t hide my feelings. 

My life is the only thing worth fighting for. 

I had to save me.

XoXo- Me