Everyday has become a struggle, a struggle to keep my head just above the water. Waiting in fear of drowning any minute. Experiencing death is like drowning, you’re pulled under thrashing and kicking trying to reach the surface again for that one last breathe. Death is unpredictable it lies and waits attacking when you least expect it, as if it were a shark waiting for its prey. I wish that I could have taken my chances with a shark instead of death. I can avoid the sea, the salt water of the ocean. Removing myself from the possibility of an attack.

Thrashing the covers off of me, I think I’m between its teeth now. Pulling the covers off from over my head, opening my eyes to the truth that is you’re gone.

I find that I don’t fear much anymore, in fact I’m not sure if I fear anything anymore. Even death to me now has a strange and mysterious lure.

I know that when I die my baby will be waiting there for me on the other side of life which then becomes death. We must be grateful for every time the page turns in this book that we call life.