Dear Avie, Help me light the fire. Ignite the flames. Please help me get through the day. I am carrying around so much weight. I can’t live without you. Show me the way out of here. I need to get away from this place. Pouring my heart out. Bleeding only for you. I have so much to say. I will write to you every single day. I hope my letters make it up to heaven.…
Take Away The Grief
Dear Avie, Another day goes by without you. You have been away from me for far too long. Will we still have each other when everything else is gone? The torment of my empty arms. Bleeding for you. Day after day I become more confused. Left here. Stuck. Looking for the light in my darkened room. I can hear you. Calling for me. Set me free. Help me break away from my misery. Take away…
I Need You To Help Me
Dear Avie, It came and swept you away. There was nothing I could do to stop it. I will always hunger for you. Hunger pains. Nothing satisfies me. Every day I struggle to figure out how to live all over again. I can’t even remember yesterday. Gone are the days. I am stuck here waiting. Wishing to be with you. Your love is so sweet. My knees are weak. I need you to help me.…
My Breath Is Going To Run Out
Dear Avie, The sun fades away. The sea’s glimmering waves are above me. Taking over me. Swallowing me whole. Pulling me under then letting me go. I have to swim through the distractions. Many creatures will appear along the way. Will I reach the surface? Or will I have to stay? I don’t know which way to go. My breath is going to run out. Left or right? Up above? Down below? Xoxo- Mommy
Looking Down From The Ledge
Dear Avie, My body has had enough. The power of my sadness is taking over me. Changing me. Looking down from the ledge. Closing my eyes. Taking a step towards the end. Jumping into the ocean. Sinking slowly to the bottom of the deep blue sea. The saltwater covers me. My lungs fill quickly. The weight of the world holds me down. I know I have the strength to break free. Kicking off the chains…
The Innocence That Proclaims Them
Dear Avie, I took photographs of a birthday party. Children were running around everywhere. Nothing but happy smiles and giggles surrounded me. The innocence that proclaims them. I miss chasing you around. Your pitter patter that once filled this house. You would use your walker for a swift getaway. Looking over your shoulder at me as I followed closely behind you. You were beyond your years. You were beyond mine. People aspire to be like…
Come A Little Closer
Dear Avie, I wish we could sit and watch the sun rise from behind the snow filled sky. I wish I could be with you now. Did I have to get broken in order to find out who I really am? Broken in order to be saved. I don’t want to demoralize myself. I need your strength. I know you will save me. No one else understands. Come a little closer. Do you see? The…
Save Today
Dear Avie, I am trying to earn my way towards you. First I have to get rid of the things that weigh me down. The anchor needs to be lifted above the ground. I am the builder of my ship but I do not have control over the sea. Where you are is where I strive to be. Time can’t save today. For time only takes it all away. Xoxo- Mommy
No Longer Blind
Dear Avie, Without your bright light of a smile, my world seems so dim. Dark. I am unable to see. Searching through the darkness. My hands reach in front of me. Searching through the darkness blindly. A bright light glows in the distance. I step closer. My eyes have to adjust. Looking through the flames. Your light shines through the darkest of my days. Bringing me back to life. Lighting my way. No longer blind.…
This Oppression
Dear Avie, The daylight flees. The ground beneath me starts to rumble. The weight of the rocks crumble beneath my feet. The gloom. Buried into the deepest part of the sea. The darkness proclaims the day. The light. Remnant amounts of light to spare. This oppression. I know I have to proclaim it. My arms reach out to you. Save me. Release me to my purpose. Xoxo- Mommy